6 principles that help me build startups and enjoy life more
When work-life balance is not more than a myth
A few years ago I left VC and became a founder. When I started my first startup, I thought my 4-year VC experience would at least help me not to make stupid mistakes. Naive.
A brief list of what was waiting for me: launch of my first startup, first investments raised, the revolution in Belarus, my home country, moving to Ukraine, the launch of MVP, first recognition, first disappointment in metrics, doubts and tossing, pivot, war, second move in 1.5 years, shutting the company down, period of digging myself, a new challenge. And that's dropping the hundreds of daily little problems that certainly seemed very important back then.
After a couple of next-to-breakdown situations, I finally realized that the main thing a founder needs to keep under control is the own head. The vast majority of wrong decisions are made precisely because of falling into mental and energy pits that strongly reinforce cognitive biases.
The reason for falling into these pits is simple – the job of a founder is to bring together what initially seems irreducible: their ego and vision, the interests of stakeholders, of whom very quickly become dozens, and then hundreds and thousands. All this in an atmosphere of the total, again, total uncertainty.
Work-life balance while building a startup is certainly a myth but it doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t treat yourself as a human being, not a robot. So I began to define a set of settings for myself on how to build startups and keep my psyche in a controlled state. This is not a framework, this is not a guide, it's just a few thoughts, putting which into my consciousness (and eventually into subconscious) have helped me make my life as a founder a lot more pleasant.
"Don't take yourself so seriously – you're just a monkey with a plan."
(c) Naval
We're flying into the middle of nowhere on one of the trillions of trillions of grains of sand, and in the big picture, it doesn't really matter what happens even to that whole grain of sand.
The search for the universal meaning of life leads to frustration, because, trite as it may sound, there is simply no such a thing. All that remains is to choose a meaning for yourself and follow it. And this meaning had better allow you to enjoy life, not to suffer.
"I have the right to build what I believe in. It would be cool if something will resonate with other people.”
Even if everyone around criticizes you and thumbs your nose at your lack of experience or ability or whatever, it doesn't mean that you don't have the right to build it.
If you dig a little deeper, doing something that you love to do, even without external motivation, is the only way to enjoy life. Plus, it's also defensibility – no one in the world can ever be better at being you than you are.
The second part of the principle is also important because it helps to work with frustration. If you do something with the goal to make someone like you, then failure is very hard on the psyche. If you enjoy the process of creating itself, you'll have the strength to try and try, and the chance of building something really worthwhile is much higher. And even if it doesn't work out, at least you enjoyed the journey!
"I have the right to communicate as an equal with anyone."
Often, founders fall into this cognitive trap of groveling while communicating with potential partners (investors, strategic partners, etc.) who have achieved more.
The reality, however, is that success is very much a matter of luck, and on a universal scale, it means a little. Therefore, it is possible to communicate on an equal footing with anyone.
"I have the right to be wrong. It would be cool if sometimes I will be right."
This is both an obvious and very difficult principle to implement. Yes, when you're exploring or creating something new, your journey is literally made of mistakes. But man, how hard is it not to forget!
The attitude that mistakes are bad leads either to self-deprecation and depression when there are plenty of them (and there will be plenty), or to the fear of making decisions and mistakes (will you believe in the success of a startup with such a founder?), or to all at once.
"I have the right to not know.”
Lots of founders fear the phrase "I don't know" like fire. Wth, it makes me not an ideal leader and business partner! How do I electrify people to follow or support me if I openly admit that I don't know something?
Usually, they try to get out of it, as if they were in an exam they didn't prepare well for, and that is what seems truly cringy. Half a year of living in such a paradigm and it sinks deeper into you, and you already start to be afraid of not knowing something, even alone with yourself. There are several ways such a situation can evolve, but most of them lead to deep depression. How much does it help to create and build?
And the final one – “I want to face my fears."
Fears only live inside your head. Giving them free rein and bending over is not an option, it only gets worse over time. Important decisions are not taken in time, everything rushes in a random direction, the problems pile up and sooner or later there comes a moment when it is physically impossible to resolve them.
Again, this is by no means a framework or a guide, these are just thoughts that help me personally. I'm sure that every founder's path is unique, so will be a unique set of principles. But it seems better to have them than not.
It's not easy to become a founder, and it's also not easy not to quit. It's a very lonely path. So it will be cool if this post gives someone some food for thought and reflection. Following the second principle, lol.
Take care and keep building.
Yura
Also have a look at some of my previous posts: